Affairs and Divorce

 

Some Figures

 

Of all the marriages annulled in 2005 in the UK, roughly 40% blamed the breakup directly on adultery. In many cases, where the people concerned did not want to get into trouble or did not have the money to afford a longer proceeding, the divorce was put up as ‘amicable’, while the real reason remained adultery. Men were more adulterous in general, with wives lodging the complaints in 75% of the cases. However, as the British Attitudes Survey reveals, men are also more forthcoming and more than 70% prefer revealing about their affair to their wives by talking directly about it. Remarriage rates are rising, and so is the number of second divorces. Cohabitation is often being hailed as a better bargain now, but the rate of cohabitations breaking apart is even higher than marriages. Most couples agreed that this was a traumatic phase for them, and even more so for the children, if they had any offspring.

 

Reasons for Affairs

 

Why do people fall in love again? Do they also simultaneously fall out of love with their present partners? Does an affair have anything to do with love at all?  Let us have a look at some of the most common reasons cited for having broken the sanctity of the holy wedlock.

 

·          Mid-life Crisis: The most common pattern of extramarital affairs still follow the same old formula of a tired middle-aged male falling for a younger female. These affairs are usually nothing more than a fling, and the vast majority of them are transient in nature. The woman concerned is not the important factor here; it is what the affair signifies. Older women are beginning to show similar symptoms too as work pressure build up, and the daily grind becomes too much for them to take.

                                                                

·          Late Marriage: Most people, of both genders, do not consider marriage at all till they are about 32. Though the maturity level is much higher by then, it is also true that people become more rigid with age. As a result, a complete compatibility may not be worked out. The result is a bad first marriage, followed by a better, more stable second relation.

 

·          Daily Schedule: Many women, who pride themselves on balancing the tough acts of a successful career and brining up children smoothly, suddenly find themselves lonely after the children grow up. Therefore, they enter into a new relation to start a fresh chapter of life, or simply because they are too tired of the boredom of the daily schedule.

 

·          Love: It may catch you unawares, and start blooming at the wrong time, but this is the strongest human emotion, and can override all other considerations.

 

Why is it Easier Now?

 

There are certain factors that have made it easier now to have extramarital affairs. Some such factors are being discussed below:

 

·          Greater Mobility: The nature of our jobs has changed and so has our lifestyle. The world is a smaller place now and people can connect to each other much more easily.

 

·          The Internet: Chat rooms, blogs and social networks have made it even easier to stay in touch over great distances or connect to old flames.

 

·          Laptops and Mobile Phones: Devices like the laptop or mobile phone are handy and afford a great deal of privacy. It is much easier to sustain a relation for quite some time without getting caught.

 

·          Changed Social Structure: The fear of divine retribution is no more there. Familial ties are much more loose and children prefer to keep to themselves.

Is it Worth It?

 

This is a question every one asks himself or herself before going for a divorce. There are two criteria to be kept in mind here. Are you really sure that you want a way out? You may or may not be in love with the so called ‘beautiful stranger’. But do you seriously want to get out of the relation and all the habits and comforts that you have taken as granted by now? The second thing you need to know is whether your marriage is quite dead. If there is no way of restoring it, affair or not, you should leave anyway. 
  

Article Source: http://www.theukarticledirectory.co.uk